by Jim Trojan
Hello, my name is Jim Trojan, and I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia. I have had my diagnosis for 20 years, and through the ups and downs, I have come to appreciate the support of my family and others who have helped me get to where I am today. I have some wins in my favor.
First things first, my first experience with hearing voices started around the age of 18, with thoughts people knew I was cheating my way through school. It got so serious thereafter that I dropped out of college shortly before graduating. I left because of these extremely embarrassing thoughts.
Little did I know I would soon end up in a psychiatric hospital. But it would not be for almost a year. As time went on, hallucinations and voices became very scary. I thought people were filming me, helicopters were chasing me, and everyone was looking to ruin my life. I began to take long drives, ranting to myself. –
Finally, one late night after veering off the road into someone’s backyard, having to knock on someone’s door and call someone who wasn’t home to come get me, the people drove me home. I think the last words were that I needed help. And help is what I would get.
A few weeks later, after multiple attempts to get me to the hospital or see a school psychiatrist, my mom called the police. Soon they came up the road, sirens off and slowly. When I got downstairs, the police helped by asking some questions and having me sit at the kitchen table. Soon thereafter, they had my parents take me to the hospital. They followed close behind in their police car. It was the start of a happy ending, as I like to call it!
When I was there, I had to be sedated after much time and questioning by doctors. I was taken to a psychiatric facility where I was prescribed antipsychotics. This started to calm me down a bit. I had a week stay there. While I was there, I tried to find ways to leave—I asked people for help, I stayed up all night, I thought my old friends would break me out. I met with the only doctor I’ve ever known about people with these problems. He shared info on schizophrenia. He questioned me. He was very good. He took me on as his patient.
It’s been twenty years through all this. I still have problems. But I’ve gone on to have consistent work. Even now, there was loss of jobs due to my illness. I had to win the trust of people again. And trust is what I would get back.
The most important thing I’ve learned from all this is that most are willing to give you a chance—even the ones who know ahead of time, even when it ended badly. I will have you know that I have accomplishments over the years. They are staying on meds, keeping with my family, finishing school with a BA, getting married, having a son, appearing in a news article about my condition, and working for my father-in-law. –
I have traveled a lot since my illness became apparent—or the days of the wild west, as I call it. Thank you!